I was four. I was cold and I sought the warmth of the school’s back steps. It was one of the few spots in the morning sun. The bare dirt of the play yard was filled with noisy children and the dark shade of autumn maples.
I watched the rough play as the older boys ran around propelling a type of merry go round. Those on the spinning platform clung to hand holds sprawled on top of one another. Children fell off, others ran alongside trying to jump back on.
I was safe breathing quiet and calm. Perhaps it disturbed her. “Go play with the other children.”, was the sentence. I obediently walked to the dizzying and chaotic platform and she took my seat on the steps.